Saturday, January 22, 2011


Yikes! 6 months? That's all I'm gonna say. And sorry.

So. Where do we start? This feels like the time that an old high school friend and I got together but we had nothing to say because we facebook/blog stalked each other and had nothing new to say because we aren't that close, but are friends. This just feels awkward, ya know?

I've decided that I don't want to change the world. Well, if the opportunity presented itself, sure, I'd take it and wrap it in a tortilla and smother it with sour cream and melted sharp cheddar, but that's not my priority anymore. I've decided that the most important thing that I can do right now with my life is to raise kids who will change the world. And if by accident I cause some waves in the process, cool.

I have three kids. No babies, no toddlers. I am officially in the raising stage. Now I shape them into the adolescents that will shape the adults they will become. And the thought scares the crap out of me. What if I mess up? What if I raise strong kids, but they're strong for all the wrong reasons? What if I'm too strong and in the process make them weak? I've had countless discussions with Bigpoppa about how to raise strong kids. I don't feel that I am who I am today because of how I was raised, or because of something specific that my parents taught me. Most of me today is just me through eternity. I will swear without a doubt that my parents molded me for the better, but I am vastly different than my siblings, and we were all raised the same. I am me, an no amount of teaching will change that. What do I do if I have a kid who is inherently someone I would dislike?

Now, let me be the first to tell you that my kids are awesome. They are strong and smart and independent when they need/want to be. And that's how all kids should be. Paul is sensitive and emotional, and feels a need to be validated and noticed. Nona likes to take charge and take care. She's the mother hen to her brothers. Beau, and it may still be too soon to tell, but Beau is carefree and fun loving and shirks all responsibilities. He loves letting Nona take care of him.

I want to know, though, that when push comes to shove, my kids are going to stand for something. And the only way I can think of to make them do that is to set an example. Maybe to allow them a chance ask me questions about having principles.

I don't know guys. I'm just making this all up as I go. What parent isn't?


TopHat said...

I look forward to the kid stage. It's going to be fun!

Sallyseashell said...

I agree, I want my kids to have a voice. I want them to stand up for themselves and know themselves. I often wish that I knew myself better in high school so I could've stood up for who I was and what I believed as a person. I am hoping my kids will have a better grasp on that.

Onion Girl said...

One thing I admire about you is that you are not afraid to be who you are. You stand up for what you believe in. your children are going to see what a great example you are. Not to mention you are a great example to me as well!